Tuesday, 1 October 2013

the price of love

The price of love is that sometimes it is not returned, or worse - you and it are rejected by the people you love and trust with all of your heart and mind and body.

This happened to me starting three months ago with people who I never would have expected. People who were the only ones capable of shaking me to my very foundations. I have no shame in saying that this situation has come close to breaking me and has made me question every belief I hold. Including that about love.

But starting today, I'm going to try and get it back. For the next 30 days I am going to write about the nutritional cleanse and detox that I am undertaking. Let me be clear - I think these things are generally a load of crap that feed into the fears of insecure women. But in the spirit of trying something new, of testing my firm beliefs, of trusting someone who has always had my back, and trying to say 'yes' when I would normally say 'no' - I'm doing this. God damnit I am doing this because I am stubborn and determined and I can't feel any worse than I have recently.

For the next 30 days I plan to record a brutally honest account of what is happening to me physically and emotionally. I am the world's biggest skeptic but if this thing restores even some of my balance or equilibrium then I figure I have nothing to lose. It's only 30 days, right?

For anyone who is reading this, anyone who is going to come along for the ride - sorry and thanks.

L x

1 comment:

  1. Haha! This could be frightening. Remember that time when I stopped drinking coffee?

    That was a terrible 2 days.